Giggly Gir
How many registered gift requests per guests? Price range? Help!!!! Thank you!
Answer
Well, this answer is going to be "practical" with respect to the idea of setting up a household that will last for decades and play a role in the larger relationships of community and extended family. If your focus is on maximizing your material gains from your guests, read the other answer(s).
First, understand that a registry is not about registering "gift requests". That's obscene. Nice people don't ask for gifts, or even expect them from their guests.
A registery is for helping YOU plan what you need for your household in the LONG run -- where "long" includes things like, what will you need for the coming sixty year's worth of Christmas Dinner's, children's and grandchildren's baptisms or bris and confirmations or bar mitzvahs, how will you entertain when you're lobbying on behalf of the PTA or supporting your spouse's run for governor, and so on.
And since this is about building community and family, you want to plan to set the highest standards of taste, hospitality and graciousness for the home where you are about to be the home-maker. So don't register at Target: register at a reputed department store that understands the concept of a permanent registry. That way they'll still have the name of the pattern on hand twelve years from now, when you've broken a wine goblet and need to replace it, or can finally afford that matching soup tureen.
Give your guests the benefit of the doubt: if you've registered for something that's available cheaper at Walmart they can choose for themselves to go to Walmart. If all they can afford is a spatula they'll give you a spatula: you don't need to register your preferred choice for generic things that wear out and don't come in a distinctive pattern! At the same time recognize that registering for fine china openstock gives them the choice of giving one teacup or a place setting or four place settings -- and unlike a dishrag or wooden spoon, they'll know that they're giving something you'll cherish and pass to future generations.
Register for dinnerware, flatware, and drinkware. Register for the nicest quality that you will actually USE -- no point in having 24kt-gold trimmed Spode porcelain if you'd never use anything you can't put through the dishwasher and microwave. But you can have beautiful Denby stoneware. Do not register for things that you would never buy for yourselves -- remember that you are grownups now, and it's YOUR responsibility to furnish your household with all necessities, not something to be shirked off onto honoured guests. "Real" things are in better taste than faux status -- for example either sterling silver or stainless steel are in better taste than thin silver-plate over underlying base metal. If you wouldn't spring for sterling for yourself, then choose stainless and register for that. If you have inherited heirloom china or already begun collecting high-quality pieces, then build on the patterns you already own. If your pattern is discontinued, search for a coordinating pattern that looks well beside the heirloom china.
Start with a small number of pieces that are enough to serve a typical simple meal for you and your spouse -- for example two dinner plates, two mugs, two soup plates and two dessert plates. Then add additional pieces to the place settings you've got and add additional place settings. If you are going to entertain formally always add place settings in multiples of four -- for example 2, 6 or 10 people at the table are easier to seat symmetrically than 4, 8 or 12 are. Twelve is too many for domestic formal dinners anyway, at least by post-industrial standards.
Well, this answer is going to be "practical" with respect to the idea of setting up a household that will last for decades and play a role in the larger relationships of community and extended family. If your focus is on maximizing your material gains from your guests, read the other answer(s).
First, understand that a registry is not about registering "gift requests". That's obscene. Nice people don't ask for gifts, or even expect them from their guests.
A registery is for helping YOU plan what you need for your household in the LONG run -- where "long" includes things like, what will you need for the coming sixty year's worth of Christmas Dinner's, children's and grandchildren's baptisms or bris and confirmations or bar mitzvahs, how will you entertain when you're lobbying on behalf of the PTA or supporting your spouse's run for governor, and so on.
And since this is about building community and family, you want to plan to set the highest standards of taste, hospitality and graciousness for the home where you are about to be the home-maker. So don't register at Target: register at a reputed department store that understands the concept of a permanent registry. That way they'll still have the name of the pattern on hand twelve years from now, when you've broken a wine goblet and need to replace it, or can finally afford that matching soup tureen.
Give your guests the benefit of the doubt: if you've registered for something that's available cheaper at Walmart they can choose for themselves to go to Walmart. If all they can afford is a spatula they'll give you a spatula: you don't need to register your preferred choice for generic things that wear out and don't come in a distinctive pattern! At the same time recognize that registering for fine china openstock gives them the choice of giving one teacup or a place setting or four place settings -- and unlike a dishrag or wooden spoon, they'll know that they're giving something you'll cherish and pass to future generations.
Register for dinnerware, flatware, and drinkware. Register for the nicest quality that you will actually USE -- no point in having 24kt-gold trimmed Spode porcelain if you'd never use anything you can't put through the dishwasher and microwave. But you can have beautiful Denby stoneware. Do not register for things that you would never buy for yourselves -- remember that you are grownups now, and it's YOUR responsibility to furnish your household with all necessities, not something to be shirked off onto honoured guests. "Real" things are in better taste than faux status -- for example either sterling silver or stainless steel are in better taste than thin silver-plate over underlying base metal. If you wouldn't spring for sterling for yourself, then choose stainless and register for that. If you have inherited heirloom china or already begun collecting high-quality pieces, then build on the patterns you already own. If your pattern is discontinued, search for a coordinating pattern that looks well beside the heirloom china.
Start with a small number of pieces that are enough to serve a typical simple meal for you and your spouse -- for example two dinner plates, two mugs, two soup plates and two dessert plates. Then add additional pieces to the place settings you've got and add additional place settings. If you are going to entertain formally always add place settings in multiples of four -- for example 2, 6 or 10 people at the table are easier to seat symmetrically than 4, 8 or 12 are. Twelve is too many for domestic formal dinners anyway, at least by post-industrial standards.
I am looking for top quality dinnerware for 20 people?
Elizabeth7
It will be a Christmas present for my mother. We have a big family and when we have our meals together at holidays our dishes our mix and matched. My mom would really love to have a large set that matches. But I want to get her a really good dish set, not some cheap thing that breaks and scratches the first time you wash it. We hand wash our dishes by the way. Can anyone recommend a good brand of dishes and were I can find them? Here are the traits I would like.
1. Microwave and Dishwasher safe
2. Oven safe
3. Not easily chipped or scratched, like when hand washing
4. I don't really want a design, I would prefer a solid color
5. Not White, Not Black
6. Coffee cups and saucers aren't needed, but would be accepted
7. Serving dishes would be a bonus, lids would be even better
I am open to any suggestions though, who knows you might just change my mind. Thanks!
Answer
It depends on how much you want ot spend. If money is no problem buy restaurant quality, it will meet all your needs. If your budget is limited buy three, 8 piece. sets at Wall*Mart, that way you have 4 extra settings to replace what breaks.
It depends on how much you want ot spend. If money is no problem buy restaurant quality, it will meet all your needs. If your budget is limited buy three, 8 piece. sets at Wall*Mart, that way you have 4 extra settings to replace what breaks.
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Title Post: What are some pratical tips for setting up a wedding registry?
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